How 30 Year Olds Should Handle A Mid-Life Crisis

Sure, nobody has a midlife crisis in their 30's. But I don’t know about you, age is starting to creep up on me.

The biggest evidence of this happens to be on my face. My beard is starting to rebel. (Insert gasping noise here) It’s graying…and fast. I can try to fancy it up to soften the blow by calling it “peppered” or “distinguished”, but the reality is, I’m not getting any younger. I’m 35 years old, and my mirror wants me to (literally) face the music.

However, even though we all might be gracefully or not so gracefully aging, I hope that I continue to strive to live young. Not the mid-life-crisis version of living young, where I end up becoming a cheesy, ill-informed parody of myself that lives in denial of my age. I’m talking about living young in the small details of my life. I’m talking about not giving up my edge. Because after all, the vibrancy of life is in the details, right?

So I like to play my music…LOUD. Like, ‘loud-enough-for-my-pre-teen-son-to-tell-me-to-turn-it-down’ loud. And I’ve been looking at all the high tech surround-sound systems at Costco. Why? Well, because the louder, the better…and maybe, the louder, the younger!?

But funny enough…as I’ve slowly and reluctantly begun to embrace the gray, I’ve also begun to value the quiet. There’s just something about it. I don’t think I could’ve truly appreciated its power in my youth. But quiet is both captivating and beautiful. Helen Keller summed it up best when she said,

“There is beauty in everything. Even in silence and darkness.”

They say that orange is the new black, and while I’m not sure if that’s true, I am saying that quiet is the new loud. It’s important to fight for a few quiet moments every day. A few quiet moments where you can listen to your heart. A few quiet moments where you can communicate with God. A few quiet moments where you can put the whole world on hold. Quiet is the new loud. Quiet is one of the places where we recharge.

Here are three places to find brief moments of quiet every day.

  1. In your vehicle while you’re on your commute.

Yes, I know. There is no better place on the planet to crank your favorite record to 11, and by all means, I insist that you still do it. But there’s also no better place to steal yourself away for a few minutes before and after your day slaps you in the face. Turn off the music and turn on the quiet. Just absorb the quiet. Your head and heart will thank you for it.

  1. Just outside your front or back door.

There’s something about the outdoors. There’s something about the expanse of the sky and the feeling of dirt, rock grass and fresh air. God hardwired us with connection to the elements. Maybe it has to do with God giving man his first job as a gardener, I’m not sure. But what I do know is that there’s no quiet like the meager and humble refuge on the other side of your front or back door. Find 5 minutes to step outside and into the quiet.

  1. On your couch, without your TV, laptop or phone.

They said, “there’s no place like home”, and they’re right. And nothing represents ultimate relaxation in your house more than your couch. It’s the hub of your personal living space, and you need to experience quiet there. It can be hard though. You’re competing against all kinds of entertainment that is screaming for your attention. So turn off the TV, laptop & smartphone…and sit in the middle of your living room in complete silence. Listen to your heart beating. Just for a few minutes. These moments rarely happen anymore. And there’s something magical about them.

If this didn't help you then I found this fun infographic to help you navigate these difficult waters.


How did this make you feel? Where do you find quiet in your life? Let me know in the comments below.

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23 Responses

  1. I’m not really worried about having a midlife crisis, research proves that less than 10% of people actually have one. I do agree that we need more quiet in our lives though. The man-made noise drowns out God’s creation more than ever, so for me, there’s no where I’d rather be than out of the trail. Since I can’t always be hiking, I use every opportunity I can in order to have my quiet time with God–as soon as I wake up, during breakfast if possible, while getting ready, in the car, etc. He is my peace and my refuge and I can’t get through my day without spending time with Him.

  2. Love the encouragement to find more quiet. I think that is valuable advice for anyone these days. I don’t know if I can relate to the definition of mid-life crisis here. I’m 31, which might be more of a quarter-life crisis, but it’s more about making sure I am contributing something meaningful and positive to the world and living my daily life in a fulfilling way. I want each year to be better than the one before, and I know that a big corporate career and botox are not the answer. I’m just not sure what is. -M.C.

  3. Surely 35yrs is not ‘mid life’ ? One is still so young with energy and lots to look forward to, Looking back at ‘youth’ when one is still young is not good for the soûl.

    Living Gods way of purposeful life gives strength, vitality and a joyful and youthful attitude.

  4. I like the infographic. I think that people in the helping professions really need to excel at a work/life balance. I hear burnout is high in those professions because you don’t feel appreciated enough and that the amount of work you put in is really worth it. I love standing out under the stars at night and being amazed at the vastness of the universe. It is truly beautiful. Thankfully, I live in a place where I can do that : D.

  5. My quiet time is around 9p.m. Laying in bed with windows open listening to God’s creatures, watching cats sitting in windows also listening. Communicating with the Almighty King of our Universe! Mid-life crisis? My ex went through one and decided to go where he thought the grass was greener. He is alone, retired and wondering what to do with his life. Through the divorce I found God. I now live for him and his purposes for me. I am also alone, but am fulfilled, joyful and know where I’m going when God is done with me on this earth. Hallelujah!!

  6. I believe that somehow, our hearts and intuition know exactly what we want to become. So it’s best for us to take time off the noise of other people’s opinions about us; which may drown out our own inner voice. God doesn’t speak in a noisy environment.

    1. Yes they do. I believe God gave us our desires for a reason! I also believe he does speak in a noise environment, although we need to learn to tune out the noise in order to hear him

  7. Love it. Just came in from spending quiet time on the porch of our summer beach condo (listening to the rain and watching the lightning over the water). Refreshing.

  8. I thoroughly enjoyed this article and agree wholeheartedly that to seek moments of Quiet/Peace is so important for our sanity and soul’s well-being! I find that the early hours of the morning is the best time for me…

  9. Excellently put! Being in my late forties I must admit that ‘quiet’ appeals to me, and I try to practice/embrace ‘quiet’ as much as possible. (Love your daily inspirational’s – all very apt and relevant to today’s world)

  10. I couldn’t agree more with this post, I have been doing these exact 3 things for the last few months to the point of isolating myself because of burnout. It’s probably not healthy but I strongly believe that alone time and quiet time is necessary to restoring oneself. The world feels a bit too noisy sometimes and I think going into nature like camping, hiking or gardening is the best way to get away from it all. Another favorite place is the ocean, there’s something soothing about the waves and swimming in water. I think as long as you have passion for what you do, you will stay young at heart =). Thank you for posting this enlightening article, reassures me that I’m not the only one going through this!

  11. Great article Dale! As a young man myself heading towards the, again young, age of 31; I can start to relate to what you’re saying. I also really agree with the quiet. Give me a quiet area wrapped in the beauty of God’s creation and my creative juices go crazy!

  12. Great insight into what a midlife crisis is. I am 29 turning 30, I have had no real career (basically going from job to job), I have no real possessions (losing everything time and time again to many different bad relationships), I live in a one bedroom apartment (after moving around a lot). I am in a lot of financial debt (many bad decisions growing up but im paying them off one by one). I am at the stage were even as I turn 30 I have no sence of accomplishment in anything. I fear my life is halfway to retirement and I have nothing to show for my life so far. I fear I am a waste of air sometimes because I have done literally nothing to leave any kind of imprint on society. and I am waiting for my lucky break in life. every morning I wake up and think to myself “will today be the day I win lotto or invent something to put my name in the history books” as I stare down the big “30” I still remain positive that everything happens for a reason. I am positive because being positive is what makes reality easier to deal with. my message to the world…. if I am to create any kind of message on here for the next person is: stay positive because positive is what makes it all worth it 🙂

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