A Practical Process for Dealing with Anxiety & Fear

There's a way out of anxiety and fear.

It requires that you provide leadership to your mind.

In this audio below is a simple 4 question process designed to help you provide that leadership – getting clarity, feeling calmer and therefore more confidently being able to deal with whatever is going on in your life.

The more you practise this process, the easier it becomes.

Plus, each time you do it you're dis-empowering the old pattern of anxiety and fear, and empowering yourself in a whole new positive direction…

The 4 Question Process…

  1. What specifically am I experiencing fear or anxiety about?
  2. What is absolute fact about this?
  3. What is my interpretation (the story I've added on top of the facts)?
  4. What are all the other possible perspectives I could take instead?
    • What would my best friend tell me?
    • What would my therapist/coach tell me?
    • What would I tell someone else who was in the same situation?
    • From everything I've learned so far, what's a better way of looking at this?

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8 Responses

  1. Oh wow what a great simple and real approach, I am currently going through a divorce and I can tell you the thought of being on my own and un loved has consumed me at times with everything from mild panic through to work having to call an ambulance. This will help me to reclaim some sort of control over myself and to start to move past the divorce.

    1. Hi Kel, sending you love and warmest wishes for your journey forward. Feel your inner power rise and know the Universe has you wrapped in support to flow into your path as you need it. B 🙂

  2. Thank you, Bernadette. I am caught up on the fourth step of your process. Are you just trying to tell yourself to “look on the bright side”, because I try that but don’t truly believe it. I just recently quit a job I hated and have since been straddled with medical bills which is causing me anxiety. Just saying “The bills will get paid, etc.” doesn’t seem to help.

    1. Hey Jill, so glad you reached out to check this. It’s not so much that we seek to “look on the bright side” but instead to assess ALL the available alternative perspectives that would better work for us. They don’t have to be positive, or making up a fairytale that might help us to feel better. They can be neutral, they can be factual, they can be anything which isn’t going to drag us further down. Even perspectives that keep us from dropping more into fear will work! E.g “I do accept that I’m between jobs and I have these medical bills. It is what it is and somehow I’ll find a way. Even though I can’t see a way yet, there must be a way. I’m willing to work it out. I’m willing to be open minded and to keep facing each day openly. I can get work, even if it takes time to find the right job. I’m open to the type of work I could do right now that would help me to pay these bills. I’m still glad I’m out of that job I hated, even though I have no work right now and these bills, in some ways it’s better than suffering that job I hated. I’m actually quite courageous and smart for making the move out of that job I hated, as that wasn’t helping my life in anyway. And it’s quite natural I would feel anxious right now, between jobs with these bills, so it’s okay how I feel. I accept that this is what’s happening and I’m ready to find a way forward.”
      These are just examples. Does it make sense, the style of alternative perspective we look at to reduce the feelings of fear, anxiety and victimization, and to instead stop ourselves sinking down further, or better yet start to lift up slightly above it to feel empowered to find a way forward. Love, B

  3. What a wonderfully kind person you are have listened to you a few times but this short video really touched a chord am going to give it a go . I am miles better than i was few months ago just struggling to get back to my normal self and leave all the unfounded fear and worry behind thank you for sharing so much x

    1. Hi Elizabeth, it’s a true pleasure to share the resources with you. Thank you for being a part of our community and I wish you the absolute best with practicing the tips. Much love, Bernadette

  4. I like the ” solution” that you offer. I agree that in reality, fear and anxiety has nothing to do what it truth, way, and life!

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