The Definition Of A True Friend. Do You Qualify?

Most of us have a decent-enough amount of decent-enough friendships. And as we grow more mature, we begin to recognize that a true friend is rare thing.

A recent study shows the average person has 2 life-long friends over a 75 year period. “Life-long” was defined as someone who you're in frequent contact with over a minimum of 20 years. Do you have a life-long friend? Are you somebody else's life-long friend. Or maybe you're wondering what does that type of friendship even look like?

A true friend is one who walks in, when the rest of the world walks out.

I found this hilarious, yet uplifting video showing us exactly what a true friend looks like. Go be one. Go find one.


This blog post was written by an independent guest contributor.
Author Name: D Patridge.

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32 Responses

  1. Her name is Maggie, we’ve known each others for 8 years, she’s just like an elder sister to me and I can always depend on her.. she’s like my family 🙂 and I love her…

  2. Saundra AKA Ginger has been my friend for 22 years. She’s more like family than a friend & I don’t think she’s going anywhere… 🙂

    1. It’s rare to have true friendship in our lives, consider yourself blessed, Bonnie 🙂

  3. Rachel is like the sister I never had and I love her dearly. We’ve been friends for 11 years and have lived long distance for about 7, but whenever we talk or get together we pick up right where we left off.

  4. Yep! My buddy Krista. Met her on a high school youth group houseboat trip on the Sacramento Delta. Now, she lives in Germany with her awesome pastor hubby and I’m in Montana. We love What’s App because it keeps us in contact.

  5. My bestest buddy zoey, both from nz. We Lived some wild times in London before she married an austrian farmer and I married a Swiss. Even if our lives hadn’t been so parallel she would still be my bestest friend. They have now returned to live in NZ but what’s app keeps us sane. She is my true once in a lifetime friend and I don’t know what I would do without her.

  6. Not trying to be negative, but I think only a few will be ‘lucky’ enough to have one that lasts a long time. In fact, this tends to work better with women than men, possibly due to the fact that women can be more open with one another.
    My longest ‘true friendship’ was 7 years with my pet (death do us part), don’t laugh, it was real. With other humans… mostly around 3-4 years at most before they disappeared and reappeared years later as complete stranger.
    Keep looking, I guess?

    1. Sometimes people just grow apart and sometimes people are kind of jerks. Not jerks in the sense of being mean or rude or anything, they just don’t have much sense of loyalty. I know it can really hurt when someone seems to have abandoned you, but just remember the problem is them, not you. Because if the person was having a problem with you, a true friend would be upfront and tell you what the issue was. Part of it might definitely be the fact that you’re a guy, like you said. It’s unfortunate, I think guys have the same emotional needs as women, they just aren’t really socialized to be comfortable to express them. But yeah, I think you should keep looking for sure because there are loyal people out there who aren’t afraid to express themselves and be who they are. And you can try to work on being a bit more assertive about your feelings if that’s something that’s important to you. I think it’s really important to be able to say to someone, “It really hurt me when you did X . . .” I know, it can be harder for guys, girls and women are pretty much taught to express themselves like this, but with men it’s as if they’re expected to only need someone to hang out, have a beer with, or for sex. It’s so silly.

    2. I agree with you that true friendships are hard to find! Just keep being yourself and being vulnerable and you will attract the best people who will appreciate your openness. That’s what makes the best friendships 🙂

  7. I have two really close friends that I’m hoping to be friends with for life (I’m only 22). I’ve known them both since elementary school. One is kind of like the “mom” friend in the video. Not to the same extent, but she kind of takes care of people and gives them advice. And yes, she seems to have her life perfectly together, I guess she wouldn’t agree with that though. The other friend is hilarious and great to have a laugh with, but I can have serious discussions with him too. Maintaining friendships over a long period of time is important to both of them, S is always making plans with people and trying to get in touch with friends she hasn’t seen in a while, and P is similar, and gets really hurt if someone stops being his friend, so I think there’s a good chance we will be friends for life:)

  8. A true friend is a rare thing. They can be a new friend or a lifelong friend. But the real true friend is someone who does what they say they are going
    to do when they say they are going to do it and someone that will hold you to a higher standard.

  9. “A true friend is one who walks in, when the rest of the world walks out.”

    BRILLIANT quote. I’ve experienced this, which makes me realize how much I really have, even if it’s not much by quantity’s standards.

  10. I see a video about how to know if you’re the mom of your friend group. Not the true friend one :/

  11. Yes, I have two gems in my life. Their names are Jelly and Sandy. I can’t even reduce to words the things they did to help me get through the darkest days of my life. But I want to let them know how much I LOVE them. And they are the reasons the phrase “TRUE FRIENDS” exists.

  12. I’m 40 and have 3 true friends since high school. I have found over the years we as a group have seen the highs of highs and the very lows of very dirty lows – and have always been there for one another. No judging, jealousy, fake ness. Just pure solid love for one another. We all live very far apart – one in another country, and sometimes weeks or months go by without speaking. We get together and it’s like nothing has ever changed! It’s amazing! I keep my girls very close to my heart. I would do anything for them.

  13. Part of what makes me realize who my closest, truest friends are is when I realize how much I can see their influence in my life. I met my best friend Katie during my first year of middle school. My friends from elementary school pretended I didn’t exist the first day in this new environment, family issues were stressing me out and sending my self esteem down the drain, and I was experiencing all of the usual anxiety puberty can put on a girl. I was incredibly shy and closed everyone out as a result. One day we changed partners in my science class, and I ended up getting sat next to Katie. She was loud, funny, and nosy. To an annoying extent. But honestly, that’s exactly what I needed at that time. She forced herself into my life and stayed there. She knows me better than anyone and has been there to help me through so much, to the point that I’m scared to think about where I’d be without her.

  14. Hi . i love your tweets and articles as they mostly apply to me and helps me in certain way. I am a teenager and i would like to request that you write an article about friendship in more detail.As of now, i am like the middleman between a group of friends(let them be x) and a friend(let him be y).This x seems to be under the influence of another guy(my conclusion based on certain events) and has come to dislike y.x says that y is too arrogant.However afaik,y is ok with x. Initially, y did not really know about x dislike until i told him today because i didnt want him to be in the dark. Personally i think that y isnt that arrogant but he does show some slight arrogance at times(not too often).
    Should i leave x for y?i dont think its y fault.Everyone has flaws right?I try my best to accept frens for who they are and i am hoping x could too. currently i am stuck inbetween x and y and i really dont know what to do. i want them to patch up but it seems impossible.Before this there was a conflict but x wasnt under ‘much influence'(just my conclusion) and i managed to patch them up but now it seems impossible.Currently i really dont know what to do….really at a loss because i treasure both sides of my frenship and i dont want to lose them but it seems like i might need to make a decision regarding this frenship

    Sorry for the long and messy story , i am writing this on my phone.Others opinion are welcomed too.Thanks in advance

  15. I love this video! This summer I’ve struggled with my friends not really asking me to hang out as often as they do with each other and them surprisingly not being available when I want to hang out but this could possibly be the reason why! I’m too responsible to have fun!
    -btw this is coming from a fifteen year old (almost sixteen)

  16. I have a life-long friend, and I really love her to bits. She has stayed by my side constantly. I grew up where people used me when I was convenient for them, then ditched me at a moment’s notice. Then she came along, and I suddenly was confronted with a true friend. Someone who didn’t ditch me, didn’t just keep me around for their sake but someone who generally cared about me. She and I share a really special bond, and I can’t imagine my life without her!

  17. I have the special bond of a life-long friendship with Kristine. We have been friends almost since birth (and we are now hitting 40!). We grew up as neighbors, roomed together in college (despite many people trying to convince her otherwise), and now we both have moved back to our hometown in order to raise our children close to their grandparents, and we live less than a mile away from each other. Kristine has always been like coming home. In our adolescent years, we were very different. She was the carefree, fun one.. I, the serious sensitive one. It’s funny how we balanced each other out and after so many years we have grown and now meet in the middle. She is someone that I will always cherish!

  18. I’ve always had a hard time meeting people -let alone becoming friends with them. Currently, I don’t have any friends. Some people can say how can that be true? It is. When the whole world walked out there was no one who stuck around. It’s pretty empty feeling.

    1. Wanda, don’t give up. There are people out there for you. Keep looking. And keep opening yourself up to new possibilities,

  19. I have two lifelong friends so I can say I hit the jackpot. When all other friends have come and gone through high school, college, work life and even my current life as a mom of teens, these two ladies stand by me like angels. Sometimes I wonder what I did do have such bad luck with friends I have made within the last few years – some have blown me off when I was no longer of use to them, others dropped me when I divorced and others just plain don’t treat me well or take care of the friendship, as anyone knows you have to when you cherish something and want it to grow. But Christine, who I met as an infant (our fathers emigrated to the US together and were each other’s only relative in the States) and Monica, to whom I offered a popsicle in the yard between our two houses when I was three and she 5 years old, have been there for it all. They give me faith every day.

  20. Oh my! Haha, that video is hilarious. I am most definitely the mom of my friends. I know because I was sitting here laughing and nodding that entire time. 😉

    As far as life-long friends, I probably have one or two. Although one is my boyfriend’s brother, so I’m not sure if that counts? But I definitely value my relationships and hope to build life-long friendships. This was a great post. Thanks for sharing. (:

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