There is a “Happy Place” for each of us. It is the place we can go, no matter what is happening in our lives, and we find peace there. It's a reliable safe haven for happiness, the place that allows us to breathe a deep sigh of relief when we arrive and much like comfort food, it warms us from the inside out.
For some that happy place is at the playground watching their children laugh raucously as they skid down the slides or screech with delight as they get pushed on the swings. For others that happy place might be perched at a bar with a jug of beer or a cosmopolitan in their hand (who I am to judge!). A lot of people find their happy place in nature or with animals, because of the gentle, quiet and interrupted sense of peace that comes over them when in the presence of free flowing energy just as nature intended it.
My Slightly Weird Happy Place
My happy place has all these positive impacts on me, and more. My happy place is actually quite odd. In fact, I totally understand that most people will be shocked, and possibly quite “weirded out” by the fact that my happy place is cemeteries.
Cemeteries are not the type of place most people experience their happiness. But here's the deal as to why cemetries are my “go to” place for peace and happiness.
How the Heck Can One Find Comfort There?
I find great comfort and peace by remembering the truth about life. Where some people might find that truth fearful or uncomfortable, the nature of my soul path and my personality, is that I find these things uplifting.
This “truth” about life that I speak of is just my perspective of course, because after all, anything that any of us believe is just a bunch of perspectives. I know we all have our different opinions on the meaning of life and why we are here and what lies beyond our mortal experience. For me, when I go to a cemetery I am reminded that:
- Life has a beginning and an end, and you never know when that end might come
- Life is incredibly fragile
- Life is a gift
- There is no certainty in life except that we can expect uncertainty
- As much impossibility as you might choose to see in life, there is just as much possibility available – it's all about which way you look at it
- Where life might seem to end, life can also begin
- Where some see death and darkness, others see new beginnings and light – it's a choice and a perspective
- You can grieve for what has been and passed, or you can celebrate what was and take that with you as you move forward
- There is an opportunity to make a mark on this world by being who you really are and giving of yourself fully in every moment
- Your headstone is never likely to read as a list of what you achieved or owned. It is going to be a reflection of the person you were beneath all of that, and the impression of love (or otherwise) that you left upon the people around you.
- No matter what storm you might be in the middle of, you are never given more than you can cope with
- Nothing is ever as bad as it might seem at the time, and it's only the passing of time that allows us to see that in full
- Nothing stops us from living our life courageously – we choose to buy into the collective fear or we choose to step beyond it and that choice will massively impact how our life plays out
I find these reminders revitalising, uplifting, motivating, anchoring and incredibly loving. This is because my joy in life comes from connecting to, investigating, understanding and embracing consciousness, life journeys, soul purpose, higher dimensions, death, life after death, life lessons in challenges, and the unity of the invisible and visible dimensions (form and formlessness) and the fact that everything in life is simply divine and limitless energy expressing into and out of form constantly in a cycle. So anything that reminds me of this and connects me to those truths is like feeding my soul and giving oxygen to what inspires me.
The One KEY Boost I Get at My Happy Place
Whenever I need COURAGE to step further outside my comfort zone, to go further out on a limb, to reach for my next level of growth, and to go beyond what I know myself to be presently capable of… I go to a cemetery.
Why? Because it reminds me that I'm lucky to be alive and to even have the choice to walk into courage, and so I feel it's my duty to do so.
I look at all the graves and the headstones bearing names of wonderful people who have had their time, shared their message of who they were with the world, and have now passed on, and it inspires me to make the most of my life.
As long as you're breathing, your work here is not done.
And your work here is to be who you are, fully, and to do what you love… to follow your heart. We all need immense courage to do that, particularly because the world as we know it right now is rife with expectations, and riddled with collective norms and societal fears that condition us to stay small and toe the line within the bounds of what we know. We fear uncertainty. We fear what hasn't happened yet, what may never happen, what others think, what may come, what may not come, and we project our fear and past experiences into the future in ways that risk keeping us completely stuck.
We run the very real risk that this ‘known' zone of familiarity we live in will edge out all our possibilities, and it so easily blindfolds us to the opportunity we each have to venture out (metaphorically or literally) to become all we can be!
Happy Places Rejuvenate and Wrap Us in Warmth
The other reason cemeteries are my happy place is because most often the physical environment of our happy place aligns to what we personally find rejuvenating and comforting. For me, I need quiet and alone time to feel rejuvenated. Cemeteries are so quiet and very often deserted. I know I can go there and sit in total peace. I always feel most connected to my soul self when there (higher self, intuition, soul nature, higher consciousness… whatever you want to call it!).
What do you find rejuvenating? Depending on your personality, how you spend most of your time, and what you enjoy, you might also find quiet/alone time is part of your happy place criteria, or you might find engagement, interaction, activity and movement are more centring, peaceful and rejuvenating for you. We're all different.
Define Your Happy Place
If you don't know what your happy place is, I highly recommend you think about what places and conditions give you the greatest sense of comfort, relief, peace and contentment. If you define that, then you can take yourself to that place when you really need it the most.
Your happy place might be obvious to you, or like mine, it might be quite unexpected. Pre-determining what your happy place is now makes it that much more accessible to you when in you're the midst of any chaos and your mind, body or soul feel tired, worn or confused – you can remember that place and take yourself there.
Remember – everything in this world, tangible and intangible, is energy. Every place, space and experience has its own energy. Your happy place gives you that sense of peace because of its energy, and how the energy of that place/situation aligns to your own unique nature and energy signature.
Peace Is Within – It Goes Where You Go
It is true that we can find our inner peace wherever we are, by going within, meditating, being still and present. We can be at peace in the most chaotic of places. We can create our happy place within our minds and go there in a split second and experience very real physical and emotional benefits by doing so. And yet, that still doesn't take away from the fact that at certain times it is incredibly refreshing and a gift to yourself to physically go to your happy place and to let yourself be there just because you can.
With love, Bernadette
Bernadette Logue (known to everyone as “B”) is the Leader of The Daily Positive, a Transformation Life Coach and the author of 3 personal growth books – guiding you on how to master your mind, to live consciously and soul-aligned. To receive regular coaching resources and support, join B in EvolveHQ, The Daily Positive’s private personal growth membership and community. To find out more about B click here.