The Art of Not Reacting to Negative People – in 3 Simple Steps

Every day we wake up ready to go into the world, looking to experience our optimal type of day.

We want peace and happiness. We want productivity and success. We want rewards and fulfillment.

And we plan as best we can to create that type of day we want.

We can create the right mindset and energy before stepping into the world.

We can take focused action toward the results we want.

We can choose where to go, who to be with and what to do.

These are all things we can control.

But, there’s something we can’t control, and it can have a major impact on ALL the things we want to achieve and experience.

That something is OTHER PEOPLE!

Dealing with the Negativity of Others

We quickly learn in life that no matter how zen we choose to be, other people might cross our path and bring their negative energy into our zone.

We also very quickly learn that if we get upset about their negativity, if we buy into it, if we judge them, if we resist and say it “shouldn’t be this way” … then we end up suffering and in negativity with them!

So one of the best things we can learn on our personal growth journey is the ART OF NOT REACTING TO NEGATIVITY.

It’s an art form because it takes practice, and grace.

Our human nature tends to be that we drop down into negativity unless we consciously choose to keep ourselves up above it.

When someone brings their negative energy your way, here are the 2 important things to remember:

  1. It’s like fishing. They throw out the fishing line with negativity bait on a hook. Will you be the fish who isn’t aware and bites, taking the bait and ending up in a tug of war? Or will you be the wise fish who sees the bait and keeps on swimming past it?
  2. If you give your energy to negativity and negative people, you’re flushing it down the toilet. Your energy is so precious, and each day you only have a certain amount of that energy to give to the world. So you have to be super smart about what and who you give your precious energy to. If you give it to negativity, you can’t give it to your goals and dreams!

So, in order for us to experience the type of peaceful, happy, productive and successful day we want, we have to learn the art of not reacting to negativity if it crosses our path.

We get prepared in advanced, so we can masterfully deflect it.

The Art of Not Reacting to Negative People – 3 Simple Steps

Here’s a 3 step process to help you practice non-reaction…

1. See it Coming

You know what negativity looks and sounds like. So be present and aware for when it crosses your path. If you see it coming (like a baited hook dangling in the water!), you have a chance to stand back and breathe before biting! You can instead make a conscious choice not to engage with that negativity.

2. It’s Not About You

Always remind yourself that other people’s negativity is not about you. It’s a reflection of something that is going on inside their mind and emotional system, and it’s being projected around you or toward you.

Too often we get tangled up in other people’s negativity because our egos take it personally and react to their behavior or words. Rather – keep accurate perspective that someone who is being negative is just a fellow human being going through pain. It’s not about you.

3. Wish them Peace & Happiness

The quickest way to non-reaction and inner peace when you’re witnessing someone being negative around you or toward you, is to wish them peace and happiness.

This doesn’t mean saying out loud to their face, “I wish you peace and happiness”.

It’s a mantra you say inside yourself.

This is a practice of conscious and spirited living to say within your own mind and heart, “I wish them peace and happiness. I wish them peace and happiness. I wish them peace and happiness…”

I know you don’t want anyone on this planet to suffer, not you or any other person who crosses your path. And using this mantra helps you to sit in the energy of forgiveness, compassion and detachment.

The Art of Not Reacting to Negative People – in 3 Simple Steps

Ready for Radical Positive Mindset Changes? FREE MASTERCLASS

Get started with my free MASTERCLASS for lasting positive changes in your mindset and your life – with a proven 6-step transformation process (built from 10+ years of coaching experience). This masterclass will help you to master your mind, becoming the powerful person you really are, so you can get what you most want out of life. Plus you’ll get regular inspiring emails, other resources and actionable tools to support you!

Your privacy is our priority. See here for our Privacy Policy and Terms.


16 Responses

  1. This is absolutely priceless advice.It would simplify my life if I could make it a way of thought and action.I want this to be my reality.
    Thank you Bernadette
    I wish you everlasting peace and happiness.

  2. Thank you, Bernadette
    I battle with negativity on daily basis, as it involves a family member. Your advice sounds great, I will work on it and hopefully it will make my life easier and more positive.
    Thank you.

  3. Wow this is great advice for me in my struggling marriage.
    When I am able to feel and behave in this way I feel i have more energy, and a good role model for my boys of what REAL strength is and more self love as I get closer to the person who I want to be.
    Thank you for reminding me that with God’s help and my personal effort and practice I will have the strength to do this.
    Things are on the rocks and the ability not to react/retaliate with negativity will go along way to getting us back on track…..I will keep you posted!

    Reminds me of a bible scripture I love ,I hope you don’t mind me sharing…..

    “The insight of a man certainly slows down his anger,And it is beauty on his part to overlook an offense.” (Proverbs 19.11)

    I’m so sorry this is so long.
    This is the first time I’ve ever commented on a post before!!!
    I can’t believe how therapeutic and comforting to know I’m not the only one struggling with these problems 🙂
    Thank you B

  4. “I wish them peace and Happiness”
    #forgiveness #compassion #detachment
    This is timely, thank God I come across this wonderful article of #BernadetteLongue truly inspirational and uplifting. Life is wonderful and challenges are part of the journey, we have to learn and accept in order live life to the fullest. Sometimes facing our greatest fear and being at peace with it will help us through this journey. Just enjoy every laughter and tears, let go as soon as you can and never dwell with negativity always move forward and be open new opportunities or even create them. Never let anyone destroy your inner peace that should not be compromise, keep that calm you desserve it!

    Thank you for this wonderful blog it means so much to me and I can see that this is also touching others here. Keep the circle positive and happy!

    Blessed be! =)

      1. Wow, I really like this, it has helped me see how I shouldn’t react to for example in my case my mother in-law is so full of negativity….making herself the victim because I married her son & took him away from her ( as per her in her mind) I’m definitely gonna try this advice

  5. Someone taking your quiteness, your patience your forgiveness to advantage, from years & keeps overdoing it. Then what you will do.

    1. Thanks for your message Kailash, yes indeed that type of situation calls for more steps to take care of oneself, such as possibly setting boundaries with that person about what is and isn’t workable, acceptable, okay with you. Also have a conversation with them about it, how you feel, what isn’t working and what you need going forward. With love, B

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.