Have you known an addict or been an addict? Are you an addict now?
Unfortunately, addictions come with the human condition. We’ve got alcoholics, drug addicts, sex addicts, workaholics, self-mutilators, and more. You name it, our culture has found it and become addicted to it.
Addiction is defined as anything we do repeatedly that causes harm to ourselves and/or others. The underlying driver to addiction is a general dissatisfaction with your life, your self-image, or identity. In extreme cases, an intense self-hatred and a sense of hopelessness and despair are the foundations of addiction.
Are you saying to yourself right now, “I can’t think of anything I’m addicted to”? Well, I’d say to you, “Come on. We’re all addicted to something.” If you don’t think that’s true of you, look through this list with me. Are you addicted to:
- Achievement – Always needing to perform to feel valuable
- Self-Pity – Constant feeling of “poor me” and “life is unfair”
- Worry – A consistent lack of peace
- Drinking – You need a drink to be happy, sleep, or feel connected to people
- Being Busy – If you’re alone or still, you feel depressed or lonely
- Sex – You can’t stop viewing porn, quit masturbating , or view the others without sexual thoughts.
- Social Media – You’re constantly connected to your phone or computer, ignoring the people right in front of you
- Gambling – A need to take risk, make money, and feel valued from winning
- Self-Sabotage – You can’t hold on to a relationship, you screw up great opportunities, and you can’t allow yourself to succeed.
Yes, you can be addicted to so-called positive things such as achievement. Take it from one who knows. In my life, I’ve struggled with a serious addiction to being busy and achievement. Achievement became a part of my identity. I started 6 businesses within 8 years producing over $15 million in revenue. But I didn’t know who I was apart from outside praise and achievement. My addiction to work and achievement linked directly with a general dissatisfaction, if not, a downright dislike for who I was. I thought that my identity and worth was based solely in what I accomplished instead of who I was.
The bottom line is this: we all just want to be loved. We want to feel loved. We all deserve love. We starve for connectivity and depth, but we’re seriously scared and often times, lack the basic relational ability to reach out and get it.
So, if you had to choose something, what would you say you’re addicted to? Think about your thoughts for the day. Are there patterns? Ruts? Are there places in your mind that you continue to visit and obsess over during each 24-hour period?
What are they? Be brave and write them down. Let’s begin the healing process.
Now I want you to listen to me here. You deserve better. You deserve more. You were created for awe and purpose. You were created to love and be loved. The things that grip you don’t have to strangle the life out of you. There is hope and there is a way out.
Today begin telling yourself the opposite of the lies in your head. Begin practicing love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness and self-control. Tell a trusted friend about your addiction. Reach out. Call a group. Don’t wait. This is your life we’re talking about.
You deserve normal. You deserve love, balance, joy, peace, and success. Go after it.
